


A True Gentleman

by gingerbread man (xphantomhive)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Crossdressing, Cuties, Dorks, For real Dave is a knight, Gonna be honest here, Halloween Oneshot, Headcanon, John is an Heiress, Kissing, M/M, Oneshot, Pretty cliche costumes guys, T+ because swearing, That's right you heard me, That's the only reason, These tags are so stupid omfg, This girl, What even though it's May, Who even writes a halloween oneshot in May, cavity inducing fluff, hand-holding, that's all, that's why, uh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-17
Updated: 2015-05-17
Packaged: 2018-03-30 22:10:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3953626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xphantomhive/pseuds/gingerbread%20man
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A true gentleman dresses up as a Knight and escorts his Heiress to an ice skating rink.</p><p>Unless the Knight can't skate to save his life, then the Heiress will have to teach him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A True Gentleman

**Author's Note:**

> Haha what. I have like three stories to update and instead I wrote this.
> 
> And that description though. Haha what. Guys take the laptop away from me.
> 
> Guys.

Dave hates his step-sister.

Alright, no, he doesn’t really hate her -- she’s actually a decent person, if you can get around her constantly trying to sneak her way into your thoughts. He hates her because she had somehow looped him into attending her girlfriend’s Halloween party, taking place at his least favorite establishment; the ice skating rink. Dave is near perfect at everything he tries, but when it comes to anything involving balance, he’s absolutely shitty. His step-sister, Rose, knows this. She invited him anyway. He was completely ready to decline, but then she had managed to do the _thing_ , where she gets inside your thoughts and makes you want to do something you actually never would.

It sucks and Dave hates it. He wouldn’t let her make him a costume, because knowing her she would make him something stupid. Even with promises that she would never make him a moronic costume that he’d wear in public, he couldn’t believe her. Never believe Rose Lalonde; it’s what’s best. Dave can’t stand this costume store, but it’s the only one that’s decently close and he doesn’t want to waste up all the gas in his motorcycle trying to find a decent costume emporium, _damn_. He strolls through the aisles with his hands in his pockets and pretends not to notice that there’s no one here. This place really does blow.

“Do you need help?” Someone questions, and for the love of God, they didn’t have to startle him like that. Dave nearly jumps out of his skin. The person giggles. He’s ready to wring their neck for scaring him and then proceeding to laugh about it, but as soon as they lock eyes he can’t breathe, so he guesses there will be no neck-wringing. Said giggling frightener is a boy, probably around his age, with untamed ebony hair and eyes that actually are so blue they give the ocean a run for its money. His glasses are crooked on his face and he has buckteeth, and _oh shit_ he’s super cute and really hot all at once, how does someone even do that? “I’m sorry. So, do you need help or anything?”

Before Dave can stop himself, he invites the boy to the party. Word vomit. He tilts his head sideways, as if confused, before breaking into a smile. _Shit no shit what, stop smiling, you’re twisting my guts up._ “Well, sure. I just met you, though! That’s a little abrupt, don’t you think?” Hell yes Dave thinks it’s abrupt. He knows the whole stranger danger rule, but he’s beginning to wonder if it applies when the stranger is this adorable and hot all wrapped up into one package.

He swallows roughly. “Uh, yeah, I guess. Do need help, though. Came in here to find a costume and all of ‘em are absolute shit, so I haven’t found a thing.” Dave says, controlling his voice and making sure the words are stoic. The boy giggles again, which is completely un-manly, but he seems to care less. “On another page, the uh, the party is tonight. I kinda waited ‘till last minute to buy a costume, which I guess was pretty fuckin’ stupid of me.”

“Oh, no, it’s fine! Last minute plans are the best,” The ravenette grins, and Dave realizes he still doesn’t even know the kid’s name. He squints to see the shiny nametag pinned to his hideously brown shirt, probably a uniform, and even under the lights and behind his glasses he can clearly see that it reads “John.” That name fits him. “C’mon, I can get you a costume from the back. The ones there are always much better. And if we’re going to make it to the party, we better hurry!”

Well, alright. Apparently, no one really taught little John that the main thing you always need to remember in life is “stranger danger.” A stranger invites you to a party with them, what do you do? You sure as hell don’t say yes. Dave allows himself to be lead to what he assumes is the back of the pitiful shop by the blue-eyed worker, and before he knows what’s happening a costume is thrust into his hands. He goes to eye it, but he can’t because a set of hands clamp over his eyes. What even? “No! You have to put it on first. You aren’t allowed to know what it is! Now go somewhere else, so I can get changed, too.”

Dave would rather stay and watch John change, but hey, that’s him. He turns on his heel and high-tails out, on the hunt for a bathroom. Once he finds one, he realizes this is probably the worst place to change, but he shrugs and does so anyway. It really doesn’t take him long, and when he steps out of the stall he’s in to look in the mirror he is pleasantly surprised to see that he is dressed as a knight. Honestly, it really isn’t as bad as you think a costume like that would look. A silver hood, some black pants, and a red shirt with a super fucking strange symbol on it that Dave doesn’t care to dwell on. He leaves the bathroom and finds John waiting for him, sitting on the counter.

And shit. _Shit_. The boy is wearing a goddamned dress, lord have mercy on his soul. It’s a pale blue, reaches to his ankles. There’s only a small slip of pale skin, but that really doesn’t matter, because when he jumps from the counter and shoots Dave a sweet little smile before leaning to grab something, and the blonde realizes that his entire _back_ is exposed to the world, a v-shape split down the back of the dress. He stands and smiles for a second time, waving a crown in the air that glints under the artificial light. “I decided to be an Heiress. It’s cute, isn’t it?”

Okay, wow, Dave needs to take a breather. It’s more than cute. It is the embodiment of cute. Holy shit. “Yeah, real cute. And I’m your Knight, then?”

John grins. “Yeah! Oh, and I hate to tell you, but I was already invited to that party,” He giggles breathily. “My half-sister Jade invited me last week. She told me that I’d love to meet her friend Dave, who’s blonde and carries himself with a little too much confidence. That’s you, right?” Oh, Dave is going to hit Harley for this. They’d dated a few years back, and she promised one day he would be forced to meet her half-brother, John. Why hadn’t he pieced that together by now?

“Sounds like me, so gonna go out on a limb and say yeah,” He shakes his head. There are times like this when everything is so ironic he can’t even handle it. “Well let’s go then, since I’ve just become your driver.” With another smile (Dave wonders for a second if John ever stops smiling) he skips over to Dave and locks their arms together. It takes them a few extra seconds before they can finally leave because John has to lock up shop, and then he can’t find a place to put the keys so Dave shakes his head and puts them into his own pocket.

When John sees his motorcycle, Dave is pretty sure the kid all-but pisses himself. “You are going to take me to a party, on that? Dave, it’s a killing machine!” The blonde raises a pale eyebrow, rolling his eyes beneath his shades. A killing machine. It’s only a killing machine if you don’t know how to ride it, which he does, thank you very much.

“Shut up and get on,” He commands, swinging a leg over the bike. John huffs, crossing his arms like a child who is ready to pitch a royal fit. “Oh, come on. I’ll letcha wear the helmet if that’ll make ya’ feel any better, and you can hang on to me the entire time. I won’t let ya’ die, okay?” The ebony-haired boy only stares for a second, before caving and pulling himself onto the back of the bike.

Dave’s lips twitch. He almost smiles, but catches himself in the act. Strider’s do not emote. Nope. He takes his red helmet off and turns, pulling it securely over John’s head. Blue eyes peek at him from somewhere inside, but the helmet is so large on such a small person it’s hard to see him. “I better not die, Dave.” He mumbles, latching onto Dave’s waist. The shade-clad boy sighs, shaking his head. Under his breath, he mutters to John that he’ll be absolutely fine, then starts the bike.

John squeaks like a little girl before they’re even out of the parking lot.

In fact, he squeals like a little girl the entire way to the rink. When they get there, he’s off of the bike lightning fast, so fast that he gets tangled in his dress and nearly falls the fuck over. Dave nearly laughs, again stopping before he can do so. He reminds himself that he is a Strider and some little dweeb will not be the one to make him laugh. Nope. The blonde assists John in removing the helmet, then sets it atop his bike and prays it won’t be stolen. It hasn’t yet, so he doubts it will. Dave puts one hand out.

“M’lady,” He says, Texan accent dripping into his words. Fuck no, _no_. That only happens when he’s nervous, and goddamn, is he nervous? “Mind if I escort ya’ into the ice rink?”

John giggles childishly. Cutely. “You’re a true gentleman,” He responds, grinning from ear to ear. “My knight in shining armor.” Dave kisses John’s hand before intertwining their fingers together, earning an airy laugh from the spectacled boy. They’re greeted by Rose and Jade as soon as they make it inside, Jade being the first to react by latching herself onto John. Then she steps back and sees their interlocked hands.

“Oh, you two have gotten quite close. You haven’t even known each other for that long.” She says, wiggling her eyebrows. John jumps, pulling his hand from Dave's with a squeak of terror and locking it with his other. “No no, Heiress. You can’t let go of the knight!” The girl leans back dramatically, one hand on her forhead. John huffs.

“Can we just go skating now?”

Jade grins widely. Dave sees the family resemblance. “As you wish, Heiress.”

An annoyed groan erupts from John’s lips and he turns on his heel to rent a pair of skates, Dave following closely behind. Rose watches with the ghost of an amused smirk on her lips, while Jade’s is completely prominent, out there for everyone to see. They rent their skates at the same time, but John is the first on the ice. And then Dave actually gets really, really fucking nervous. He had completely forgotten he sucks at skating, and he sits on a bench behind the glass and watches how gracefully John is gliding across the ice, like he’s the queen of it. Or king. Or heiress?

He glides over to the glass and smiles. “You can’t skate, huh Dave?” His tone is teasing, but Dave knows it’s the truth. Huffing out a breath, he stands and straps the skates on, barely making it to the rink. Once he hits the ice, he hits the ground. John stands above him in a millisecond, babbling out, “are you okay?” and “do you need help?” Dave responds “no” to both and stands. Soon as he tries again, he fails miserably, this time reaching out for John. The boy seems to understand what he’s getting at, and grabs him by the arms, trailing his hands down them and intertwining their fingers.

“There. Now, mighty Knight, the Heiress will show you how it’s done.” John says sweetly, again cute as shit, and then they begin a really really slow glide over the ice. Dave guesses it isn’t so bad, much better than falling on his ass every five seconds. And they’re actually doing pretty well, until Rose knocks into Dave and Jade knocks into John and they both _know_ it was on fucking purpose. They go tumbling to the rock-solid ice, John on top of Dave, their fingers still twined together.

John grins crookedly. “Hi, Dave.”

Dave has to remind himself to breathe. “Yo, John.”

“Do you mind if I kiss you?”

The blonde can only stare for a minute. Had he heard the ravenette right? Had he actually just asked to _kiss_ him? Like, their lips together? “Dave, it was a pretty simple question, and honestly I’m not getting any younger.”

He fumbles for a response. “Yeah, yeah--shit yeah, you can kiss me, I don’t care.”

With another crooked grin, John is leaning down to connect their lips. It’s a lot less sloppy than he thought it’d be, as if John actually had some experience with this. Maybe he does, Dave doesn’t really know. When they pull apart (no one really breaks the kiss, it’s pretty much a mutual breakaway) John’s smile is wider. “A true gentleman lets the lady initiate the kiss _and_ stay on top. I’m impressed. You really are my knight in shining armor.” The blonde swallows thickly. How does he even react to this?

“I guess so,” He forces out. “M’lady.”

John’s smile grows impossibly larger.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't ask me what this is because I have no answer.
> 
> Also it's my headcanon that Dave rides a motorcycle and John is super squeamish around them because "Dave they're dangerous." Please okay let this be my headcanon forever, you can't stop me.


End file.
